Friday, January 4, 2008

joy bubbles up in me!



Circle Game by Joni Mitchell is my all time favorite song. I sing it a lot. It reminds me of my darling husband...a child starts out so innocently believing in all the wonder of life and how everything is possible and then ends up being a bit disappointing...but it's ok life circles around...and things get wonderous and better again.
This is really personal to me but I need to say it for some reason, to random people who may read some of the words I put out into the world...life does get disappointing and hard...it's probably hard being with me cause, well I'm just a flitty fairy flakey person and I don't have a real job...I feel bad about it sometimes that I can't just be like everyone else and go out and get a paycheck...I know it's hard for Rob to have to take care of me...and sometimes I just think life is so heavy for him he tries to take care of me and our kids and his step mom and everyone...

BUT then in the middle of the night sometimes I wake up to sound of him laughing in his sleep! And that brings me the most intense bubbles of joy and I hold his love in my heart and feel so happy!

oh yeah, nobody reads this anyway so I can say whatever I want!!! hahaha!!!!