back from the U.k.

It was a whirlwind of a trip. I suppose I should have blogged along the way it would have been more interesting! But I'll try to back track on things a bit...

This photo is of Tsingani (Teresa & Bonnie) with me in the middle. We danced at a club in London called Darbucka that is just a great place to perform. Upstairs there is a restaurant, downstairs a club. It was a beautiful evening, I had great fun and danced a solo which is always a good self inflicted torture for me...

Eventually I will be able to post the video we are supposed to get one of the show as well as photos! I really hope there are some good ones!

We had a crazy time! About 6 days before we were going to leave the person who had promised to find us lodging backed out and BIG thanks to Bonnie for finding us some decent lodging at a fair price in a hotel. We were in a room right next to the hotel laundry so it did get a bit loud around 5 am when all the employees started work for the day. But it was clean, there was a big mirror, so we could practice & there were 3 beds! What more can I ask?

During the first night there while experiencing jet lag I discovered that I couldn't knit in the dark...actually I can knit in the dark most of the time...but it's too hard to find all 4 knitting needles in the dark!!

I will tell more about the trip later...right now I must go make peach jam!!

A self portrait of Jillian by Jillian!

I'm posting this for someone who needs a portrait artist so they can see a sample of Jilly's artwork!

what I have to say today

I know this quote goes around the internet and stuff it's sometimes credited to Marian Williamson and sometimes to Nelson Mandela. I don't know who said it but I love it and keep it on my refrigerator door to help me to live these ideas...
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us. It's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

So I'm saying this to myself as much as to anyone else...don't worry if someone said something that made you feel small, you are not! You are bright and loving and good! if someone said something mean to you they didn't really mean it in their heart, they just feel small themselves and they need your love and will grow from it....remember that!

the newest bloom in my winter garden!

this one has real silver beads on it...
this looks very similar color to the last one, but it's not...this is more true to color burgundy, pink, black...the last one should have been more purple looking, blue & black.

This is the peacock flower, on this one I embellished it with glass beads and added an antique Turkoman button and peacock feathers.
: )

itsy bitsy bits of stuff done on etsy.com

It's slow going trying to put my items up in the etsy shop. I have yarns I want to post but I need to count how many yards are in the skeins, then take their pictures, try to figure out how much to charge for shipping etc etc....

And I'm working really hard on my felted flowers I don't know if it's visible from the photo but they are really big 7" from end to end. The white one is made from yarn that I spun and knitted and felted. The button in the center is a vintage button I found in an antique shop somewhere. They are very labor intensive...it's not like buying yarn & felt from the craft store or something, and I'm asking $75 for each flower so far. I know that seems like a lot of money but there really is that much work and care in each one, probably much more. We have such screwed up ideas of how much is ok to charge or spend on stuff. Especially in a world where we can buy so many handmade looking things at super stores for cheap. It's confusing to everyone including me sometimes.

making a living

Being a mom and a housewife I've worked for years without pay although I have had random jobs and do teach dance and knitting and make things for people, I've rarely in 28 years of marriage made enough money to be required to claim any income tax! And now I find myself in a position where I really want to make some of my own money and pay for the things that my family and I want and need very much and also to get myself out of debt.

It's a two steps forward one step back situation for me because I am still needed at home for non pay work babysitting Riley quite a lot. Sometimes I feel kind of hurt when women friends or just women I run into imply that I'm spoiled because I haven't worked outside the home much, I work very hard for my family and have given up a lot of opportunities to do my art because I had to care for another human being. AND being the kind of person I am I can't do anything half way! I have to do a good job of caring for others, I don't just put Riley in front of the tv and ignore her while I do my own thing, only sometimes when I really have to do something. I spend time cooking, playing, reading with her because I think it's an important job to care for someone else. I do have a bit of a martyr attitude sometimes, but I also try not to dwell on it much.

I actually believe that in a weird way what was supposed to be a feminist revolution that brought women out of their homes and into the work place is a bit of a sham. Women have really only gained more work! Now they are expected to do everything at home, be good mothers, AND bring home the money too. I AM completely feminist in my beliefs and would never say that women should have to stay at home and care for their homes, but the fact is that most human beings like to make their homes pleasant, and that takes a lot of energy. But this is a complex topic and not the topic of this particular blog.

The topic here is that I've decided to make work for myself. On my own terms. Maybe I am spoiled or at least well appreciated by my life partner in that he does offer the financial support for me to live my life the way I want. So BIG thanks to Robert. I'm going to be selling a lot of my art and I'm so happy it won't have to be just a matter of me making thousands of pairs of pants or knitting my fingers off to make thousands of gloves with no fingers. I'm going to make the things I always make in small amounts so that the work stays enjoyable...

I'll be selling my felted & beaded flowers for belly dance headpieces, yarns, knit wear, leggings, beaded bags, jewelry...whatever my heart and hands desire on etsy!

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5295254

that's my shop that is still empty but by early March it will be full of goodies from me to YOU!!!